Getting Real. What a College Degree Means...or Does Not

It's graduation time. Going back over some older "Journey with Grace" blog posts--mining their contents for my current book project--I found this post I'd never published....I imagine that especially for families who have typically developing siblings in addition to a child with special needs, graduation time can bring some pangs of grief. The grief cycle is like that. (See my post: The Ebb and Flow of Grief.) I've had my own pangs over this issue and here's the conclusion I reached:

Every other month, as I walk families through the journey to wholeness and acceptance post autism diagnosis of their child, I say this very thing. In my own grief process I woke up when Grace was about five--after grieving the realization that she was probably not college bound. I then realized that a college degree is not a stamp of a human's worth. While more and more people with autism are going on to earn college degrees, many, such as my daughter, will not. I chose to grieve that. And then get real about what it means.

Photo: Grace with her teacher, Angela Cernyar, after graduation ceremonies at Peabody College. Taken by Vanderbilt Kennedy Center, this photo originally appeared here in this post, "The Blessings of Compassion."

Comments

[Leisa A. Hammett]

Agreed. And, I have known many. Of course the point here is that having a degree or not is not a sign of worth--addressed because many, like my daughter, are unable to accomplish that feat because of their level of disAbility. Thank you.

[developmental disabilities]

Autistic persons who completes their college degrees are admirable. They are an inspiration for others.

[Leisa A. Hammett]

Thanks, Margie. Good to hear from you. Enjoyed our chat.Loved reading about your family.

[Margie Naftel]

Hi Leissa! I agree that a college degree is not necessary for a person to be human. I was raised by parents who did not have college degrees, but business school degrees and were very successful. They were of the mind set "why waste time and money in boring college when you can go to school for a practical job -- or better yet, see if you can build or do something artistic (photography for them) and make money and enjoy life?" They also wanted me to go to pilot school because they thought flying private jets would be great fun and good money. I'm just too practical. But being raised that way has helped keep my mind open to what success in life can be: love and laughter; grace and hope.